So I was sitting here, on a lovely Sunday morning without a clue what to do. A post! I’ll write a post!! But on what?

How about updates, random thoughts, silly anecdotes, and 1032142353  a few pictures…just because it’s been awhile :)

First of all, thank you for all of your kind comments on my last post. It was very rough the first couple of days, but I can honestly say now that things are really looking up. I’m not going to the gym and I’m okay with that. Actually, not exercising everyday has made me feel more comfortable, and less anxious. Imagine that!! Plus, I’m not fearing the fats (well, not as much. I’m doing a lot better!)

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This is where I explain to you guys that I am officially eating nut butter on a regular, friendly basis. And a lot of it. Like, no joke I just scoop it onto my oats, without a single thought of anxiety.

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All kinds too! I’m branching out, challenging myself. See that right there? That is cashew butter (ding ding ding MAJOR fear food). I made it myself and ate the whole batch in one school week. It was delicious. I made more yesterday, a whole jars worth!

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I took a bag of Trader Joe’s Raw Cashews and put them in my food processor for a really long time. Then, just when it looked like delicious cashew butter, I decided to keep processing it. Probably for double the time needed, but I now have insanely smooth, drippy, creamy, raw cashew butter that only cost about $7 for a full 16 oz jar (instead of $11-$15 for an 8 oz jar).

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Now that I am obsessed with nut butter, and okay with that, and enjoy making my own, I decided to do some research. AKA I looked up all of the companies that make flavored nut butters I want to try, and took a picture of the ingredients list so I can make my own! (muahaha!). Also, I thought the heart cakes were a cute idea…Expect some recipes comin up real quick!!!

 

On the note of recipes…I was flipping through the paper this morning and I noticed that Little Debbie now has what I’m calling “Twinkie Rights”. I thought this was hilarious for some reason, and my stepdad started saying how much he loved Little Debbie’s oatmeal cream pies. He had hoped they were vegan, (like Oreos) but I looked it up and they weren’t, so I said I’d make him (but not healthy lol). Anywho, as I was searching for a vegan recipe, my mom asked if the originals were vegan. Our conversation went like this:

“Are they vegan?”

“No. Eggs, egg powder, milk, milk powder…”

“I don’t understand why they use all of that when there are so many chemicals they can use instead!”

hahaha! Not that we eat chemicals or think it’s healthy, but just that we were surprised Oreos were vegan. And they are, since they use so many fake things instead of eggs and butter…. This kind of came out awkwardly…Moving on…

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I’ve told you about my “OIAJ cheating” before right? Well here is an example. I have trained my stepdad to leave me the almost empty jars for nut butter, but I still have to hide the jar when it is at optimum OIAJ readiness. Otherwise there is not enough left (see top left). In this case, I have to just add more nut butter and then I can go about my business :)

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Fun Fact!!! I ALWAYS eat my salads from the bottom up. Meaning, I eat all the lettuce first, and then I eat the toppings. I don’t do this consciously either, but I think it started as an attempt to not eat the toppings and dressings just to be left with dry lettuce. Haha, I do it with my oatmeal too, I save all the melty nut butter for last, even though its on top :) (ps this salad had half an avocado on it. Maybe it doesn’t seem like a  huge deal, or a lot, but this was a huge step for me. I have always either skipped it, or stuck to a strict serving size of 1/4 avocado at a time. So half of one in one sitting, without any anxiety, was awesome!)

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In a break from all of the food pics, do you like the hat my friend made me as a late Christmas present? It’s kind of an inside joke, but basically I have a love for all things girly and glittery, and we have conversations about saving the world and having pet unicorns soooo…..yeah :)

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Yet another example of relaxing and allowing. This is the portobello veggie fajita plate from Chevy’s, something I have previously shared and had anxiety about (too much oil! too much salt! ahhhh!!). It came with warm corn tortillas too. Well, I am pleased to say that I ate every bite of this -including the guac, tortillas and mexican rice, plus some tortilla chips with even more guac (tortilla chips >fear food). It was very good. Was it more salt and oil than I am used to? Yes. Was I a little uncomfortable? Yes.  I have a good time? Of course! Did I wake up the next morning and still a full breakfast with lots of peanut butter? You bet!!

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So thats where I am at. Feeling better, happier, more upbeat. Enjoying life and crazy hats. Branching out, more comfortable. I can’t wait to see where I am in the future :)

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